Book Review: Find Your Strongest Life

In Find Your Strongest Life, Marcus Buckingham reveals how women can draw enough strength from life to feel fulfilled, loved, successful, and in control. He helps women reconnect with their purpose and gives a starting point for change. Marcus uses research to get his message across on how women can live their strongest life.

The basic message of the book is:

Most of us were taught by our parents and teachers that the secret to success is improving our weaknesses. As it turns out, this is completely wrong-headed. You can focus on your weaknesses all you want, but you will likely only make marginal improvements. However, if you will focus on your strengths—those things that you are naturally good at and come easily to you—you can make huge strides. In fact, when you do so, you will be more happy and fulfilled. Not only that, you will make your greatest contribution to the world.

In Find Your Strongest Life, Marcus reveals research that shows that women today are less happy and fulfilled than they were 40 years ago, despite having more opportunities available to them.

Preview the first 35 pages here

I found the book offered valuable insight. Marcus talks about how women try to "have it all", but he states "having it all" does not equate to having everything, at the same time. In the book Marcus states:

"Having it all" means taking yourself seriously. It means knowing yourself well enough to find your purpose in life. It means knowing what needs to change when you sense that you've lost that purpose. It means having the faith to believe that change is possible and having the courage to make those changes. It means drawing strength from the relationships in your life, and, if there's no strength to be drawn, knowing when to cut those relationships out of your life.

Married Couples Tell All

Under the Bathroom Sink

I like organization. My husband does as well. We have this in common. What we don't have in common is what we define as organization.

This is how my husband defines organization:


Everything is in "it's place." Which is bathroom stuff under the bathroom sink.



This is how I like to have it organized, but give up since it ALWAYS ends up looking like above:


Early on in our marriage I tried to show him why his ways do not work. He throws everything in haphazardly, and I was a little beside myself to see his tossed efforts had cracked a shampoo bottle and my $25 shampoo (why I had that expensive of shampoo is for another day, but also foolish of me I know) was now a residue lining the bottom and coating everything in reach.

He is a good man, he was apologetic. But as you can see, still forgetful.

Grocery Shopping

My legs are so badly sunburned that any type of sun exposure is torturous. Thus my ever so thoughtful husband offered to pick up what I needed at the store: dish soap and paper towels.

We have been married 7 months now, and on average visit the grocery store 1-2 times a week. Together we compare prices per ounce on just about everything we buy, and buy based on what is the cheapest per ounce, etc. Seriously we do major label studying.

I should know since last week he came home with the biggest jug of bleach on the planet since it was the cheapest per ounce. He was thrilled with the find and said, "I know how much you love to buy in bulk." Lifting the bottle to pour 1/4 cup or so for laundry is a 2 person task the jug is so large.

Yet today he returns from the store with the overpriced select a size paper towels. Funny boy. He said that he knows how much I like to use different sizes. I couldn't complain, though normally my version of select a size is ripping a paper towel in half. It's much cheaper that way.

Oh, I almost forgot to mention that he also grabbed a gallon of milk. We ALWAYS without fail. . buy 1%. Today we have skim milk.

Tonight I accompanied my husband to Kroger. I should really say it was the wee hours of the morning. I hadn't showered that day and was wearing sweat pants. . and even though it was shortly past midnight at a run down grocery store, I did not want to make an appearance.

I gave my husband the task of picking up some much needed tampons. This was a first for him, so I ever so kindly gave him a coupon to accompany his shopping which not only had the Brand and Type, but also had a PICTURE of which ones to buy.

45 PAINstaking minutes later.. . . all the while I sat in the car worried that he accidentally walked out of the store without purchasing them, must have gotten apprehended for shoplifting. . I mean I saw at least five other customers park, walk in, and come back out and leave and he was still inside the store. What could possibly be the problem??

Like I said, 45 minutes later he finally exits the store with bag in hand and manages to pick up different ones as he proudly announces that he thought they were better. I sent him in with an EXACT picture. And there he was, taking his sweet time studying packages based on absorbency and such and then made his choice.

At the register the cashier loudly repeated "tampons" over and over again, and told him, "Naa man, you need the pearls. PEARLS." Thus, he did come out with some Tampax pearl tampons. Apparently he thought they would be just what I needed. Based on what experience????

That's something I can't begin to answer.

Mold

This morning I decided I would make some eggs. I proceeded into the kitchen where my beloved had set a reusable shopping bag that he had thrown all the stuff that was in his car into, and placed it on the counter.

I started going through the bag. It was a random mix of junk mail, bills, empty water bottles, empty food wrappers, empty ziploc bags, random papers, a flip flop, umbrella, etc. I started becoming suspicious as I slowly discarded the items while also noticing a strange green substance covering every inch of the bag's contents. Everything had mold on it. Before I ask the obvious:

NOW WHY WOULD YOU PUT SUCH NASTINESS ON THE KITCHEN COUNTER?!?!?!?!?!!?!?

I should state that at this point I inquired to my husband (actually let me insert here that upon removing the bag from the kitchen counter, I politely asked him if he could refrain from putting such nastiness on our counter in the future, to which he politely (and ever so sweetly) replied "Yes, Maam".

At this point I state, "Honey, your car has mold in it". He says, "yeah, I know."

I am curious to wonder what a normal person would do in such a circumstance, as this was no news revelation to him. In fact, the most I could muster from him was a basic, "Oh".

Your car is an infestation of mold spores...and you are just sitting there!!?!?!?!?!?!?!?!! is all I can help but think to myself.

I politely asked if we could go inspect the damage, but he reminded me that he had already seen the mold. I tried with all my strength to just go on about the day and forget his car has mold.. BUT HIS CAR HAS MOLD GROWING. .

I could not ignore it. We surveyed the damage together, and his entire trunk is green. I insist we must clean it immediately, but he does not have the time. "I'll just drive your car," I hear.

AND, goes on to convince me that EVERY home has mold in it. Seriously, it's in the walls apparently.

Cooking Pizza

Today my husband decided to cook a pizza.

Are you aware of the metal cooling racks you normally use to place cookies on when they come out of the oven?

Well, he decided to use it to put the pizza on as he took it out of the oven. As I saw it happen, I thought I better remind him to move it on to a different surface before he began to cut it.

But, I should have realized that though the box suggests letting the pizza sit for a few minutes, he would cut into it immediately, and on top of the metal rack. It was a difficult fete for him to accomplish (have you ever tried to cut something on a surface filled with holes?)

So now we have pizza crumbs on top of the gas burners, inside the gas burner, and all underneath the insides of the stove. Lovely.

The List

Things I did not realize..before I got married:

1. I would not have lids to any prescription bottles, medicines, vitamins, soap lids, shampoo lids because husband would use them to put his contacts in over night.

2. No more use of good towels, or good oven mitts. Husband would stain them with spaghetti sauce almost instantaneously.

3. Dirty dishes belong scattered across the counter, not in the sink. As long as the sink is empty, the world is good.

4. Dishwasher is literally out of sight, out of mind.

5. Its okay if you are the mad one for them to walk out of the room and exit the conversation and ignore you for hours. NOT okay. BIG NOT okay, for you to leave the room or avoid conversation if they are upset with you. . trust me, somehow, it's not a double standard.

6. I would actually have a disagreement on the importance of changing underwear daily.

7. Even though people give the husband advice that says, "if the wife ain't happy, ain't nobody happy." It's pretty much guaranteed they will think the person got it backwards.

8. The low fuel indicator is only visible if the female is driving

9. The heat in the apartment only needs to be on if HE is the cold one - - otherwise it is a waste of money

10. If HE does not like it, it cannot be purchased from the grocery store

11. If its NOT healthy, it cannot be purchased. Unless it is deemed healthy by my ridiculous standards of.."Well, if I like it, then it must be healthy".